As I write this, I'm listening to aspens show off their leaves as they sway in the wind. Things are so peaceful. So still. I've been on the road a lot the last three weeks and I've been thinking about this lesson. I've been thinking about you. Our home teacher came and talked about Elder Eyring quoting his old branch president, “When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time.” So, I'm going to treat our class like that. Whether you are struggling with loneliness, inadequacy, depression, illness mental/physical, things seen or unseen, this will be for you.
One of my best friends has gone through a modern day Liberty Jail experience. After years of trying to have kids, they were finally blessed with twins. The twins came terribly early and she spent months with them in the NICU. Then, when they finally came out of the NICU she was confronted with more health problems. I asked her two questions and wanted to share her responses here.
Have you felt the phrase: "O God, where art thou?" and how did you get through it?
Yes, definitely—although I should clarify that I felt it in a similar way to how Joseph felt it.How do you turn to the Savior during adversity?
In section 121, Joseph voices the question "O God, where art thou?," but he really isn't asking if God exists. In verse 4, he basically shares his testimony that he knows God exists and has all power. What Joseph really seems to be asking is, "God, why haven't you intervened yet and used your power to help the Saints?" In other words, he is questioning God's timing.
In that same light, I have definitely had many times when I've asked God why he has not intervened to relieve the suffering of my children, particularly Marc. I've seen Marc fight for his life many times and struggle through chronic issues. I've cleaned up after him throwing-up literally over a thousand times (that's not an exaggeration). And seeing him suffer has definitely made me ask a similar question to what Joseph asked. "God, I know you're there. I know you hear me. I know you've answered my prayers and healed my son before. Why does he have to keep suffering when I know you can heal him?"
I don't have an answer to that question still, but after desperately praying for understanding many times, I had a very clear, inspired thought: "Melissa, I know exactly what it's like to watch an innocent son suffer." That thought has helped me through many more difficult moments.
Interestingly, like Joseph, I haven't found myself questioning God because of my own circumstances. I've been suffering from some post-traumatic stress lately, depression coming back with that, which took me to darker and harder places than I've ever been before. But it was watching my kids suffer that made me question God's timing. Even though Joseph in Liberty Jail had every reason to question his own sufferings, I find it interesting that it is the Saints he is so concerned about.
I think turning to the Savior during adversity isn't something we necessarily learn just when faced with adversity.I loved her answers because I love every time I hear when the gospel works in people's lives. It always strengthens my faith.
For me, I've lived my whole life trying (key word) to turn to the Savior. So when adversity struck, it was a habit, for lack of a better word, to turn to Christ. I think turning to the Savior comes as we read our scriptures and pray every day, attend church meetings, and serve others. Then, when adversity slaps us in the face, we are already facing the right direction and are already looking at our best source for help, our Savior.
Continuing to do those simple acts of daily/weekly devotion—prayer, scripture study, service, partaking of the sacrament—even during trials was key for me to make it through. For example, because of my kids' circumstances, I couldn't make it to the temple for about a year and a half after my twins were born. But I worked on a different family history name every single day during that whole time (and still do) and asked others to take my family names to the temple for me. It was a small and simple way I found to do service while I was so overwhelmed myself, and it made me feel lighter.
Please read about Joseph in Liberty Jail before Sunday. Come with things that you learn about the prophet. Here is the link:
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